Tap Water Taster Gifts

'Ptuwah! This is tap water!'

Man drinking lots of water

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

Bad for you but to die for

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

"We're hoping for a really smooth wine here."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"I'm getting red fruits, earth tones, and oak. Amen."

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

Wine taster with mineral water

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

'I'm doing a wine tasting course, it's fascinating. . .'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

'Now forget that I'm your boss and the CEO. How does my new product idea, Just the Lees, taste?'

My comfort zone

'The bouquet is reminiscent of rubber nose - but then, it always is...'

'The statue of David? I thought you said Mogen David.'

"I'm getting a lot of burnt notes."

Baby at Christmas Dinner

"I can remember when water was just wet."

'I've found taking a sip of another table's wine is an effective conversation starter.'

"You can tatse the slopes, er I mean hops in this."

'Frank, it's water.'

IRS, 'Yes, but in order to deduct it, you have to be a LICENSED wine-taster.'

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

'In order to be the king's permanent wine taster, you only have to be able to do 3 things: drink, swallow...and live.'

"Honestly, it's not what you think. Mostly it's just a seemingly never-ending series of pointless tasks - but at the end of it you get to sit down in front of a TV with a beer."

'He's judging our reserve pinot noir - five years to produce it, five seconds in his mouth.'

"I'm getting subtle hints of what the Fed might do."