Tang Enthusiast Gifts

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

'I can't figure out why I keep getting wind knots.'

Bashful in Nashville

'We are so in sync!'

'Trucker's tan?'

Shore fishing requires threading the needle.

Lady walking a dog with a big tail.

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

"Do you have any books on releasing the tiger within?"

'Your dad wouldn't let you borrow the car tonight?'

'So much for the 'Eye of the Tiger'.'

Sunblock

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

'You're new here, aren't you?'

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

'We're dangerous when we shop. We're really really dangerous when we don't shop.'

Texas Dashboard Organizer

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

A Message from Your Fishing Buddies.

"As I see it, the issue with dog-walking services is that the pace is dictated by whoever is slowest..."

"Rare, medium or well done?"

Steeroids

Mall: "We always hold hands - If I let go, she shops."

Sun Umbrella

"We had these twigs flown in from Italy."

Really big bang

'Your operation is delayed for a couple of hours... there's a big sale at the mall down the street and all the nurses are down there.'