Tacky Decor Enthusiast T-Shirts

"You love anything tacky, don't you?"

Cake Free Zone

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

"I'd like to have my teeth scrimshawed without being, you know, harpooned."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

Posh Easter Egg

Rogue elephant

Leonardo Da Vinci's Cat

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

King Madras

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

'Yes,I did bag him from a treestand.How did you guess?'

Snow globe

Man who has called of his engagement because his fiancée did not match his furniture.

"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"

Food inspection results

Carnations.

'Happens every year - I can never remember where I put the tree decorations.'

'Don't say it! You're going to ask me if I notice anything different in here.'

"We need to talk."

"Would our big tacky objects look good here?"

'The old one fell apart.'

'A Dust Cow'.

Android with a computer print out as a scarf

'I don't know much about art, but I know what I like.'

Sightings reported to Americans for Decency

'Are there any new species more efficient than neons, such as compact fluorescents or LEDs?'

"Butt cracker"

"Norman, let's lend out the Olmec head."

'Edwin, I hop you'll come home in a good mood. The decorators hung the new wallpaper today.'

"I've been researching a little furniture company that I'd like to rearrange."

"I love fruit."