Table Manners Critic T-Shirts

'Billy, you're a disgrace to the undead!'

"Do you HAVE to pick your nose at the table?!!"

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

"Great coffee, Carole."

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

'One year of obedience school and he still doesn't know which one is the dessert fork.'

'For once can't we all just sit down and eat as a family?'

"The last doggy bag."

Waiter indicates cutlery for diner's tiny meal, saying: 'The one on the right is your mangnifying glass, sir.'

'For Heaven's sake Son, you're embarassing me! This is a feeding frenzy!'

"Must we discuss your worming right before dinner?"

'Don't chew your food.'

"Neat Nick!": Tidiest cowboy in the west

"Are you gentlemen ready to eat or would you like to bat your food around awhile?"

'Well, at least he doesn't beg at the table.'

"Generally, when we go around the table sharing what we're grateful for, we just *say* it, Jerry."

'Gosh, Cindylou, you can't judge a guy solely on how he eats spaghetti!'

"Oh no! Didn't you bring your phone?"

' Hey...he's not eating like a pig.'

"How do you tell the Son of God He's got spinach in his teeth?"

Mom! Billy's censoring me!

"If anyone ever asks...it's hard to eat soup with a fork."

'Quick, table two have both for their mouths full, ask them how their meal is.'

'Do you think FOR ONCE you can chew with your mouth OPEN!'

'I see you had egg for breakfast.' - 'Yesterday morning.'

'The frogs legs kicked the peas off the plate.'

'We may be spoiling him but you'll have to admit it's cute.'

"Soup should be seen and not heard!"

Break Bread, Not Wind.

"Do you have any appetizers that are just fun to play with?"

"Gesundheit!"

'Carlton! How many times have we told you not to scarf your food!?'

I don't care who you are - if you didn't reserve the round table. I'll have to seat you in a booth.