System Theorist Gifts

"My wife doesn't understand closed systems"

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

Suzie would later win a Nobel Prize for her Law of Special Social Relativity.

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

Sigmund Freud.

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

When Engineers Crack.

"It looks like a perfectly balanced system to me."

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

"Bonk!"

"Must be another paradigm shift."

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

Davos.

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

'He's working on the great American requirements document.'

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

"My System 1 tells me she's articulate, capable, shrewd. My System 2 says BIMBO."

"The central digital platform is temporarily renamed Project Schrödinger’s Cat. Until it is accessed on the 24th February it both is and is not a working system."

How Trickle Down Economics Work

Can't you anarchists do anything within the system?

Basketball Tourney. Ernie, you're crushing everybody in the office basketball pool! You've picked the winner of every game so far! It's amazing because you don't know a thing about basketball. For you, picking the winner of every tournament game is like correctly guessing a coin flip sixty seven times in a row! No, I have a system! It seems everybody has an opinion about the tourney so I listened to what my investment advisor thought about the teams. And with his record of picking winners

'So much for Newton. Now, as for Einstein...'

'So, how should we play this - capitalism or socialism?'

"Do you ever wish you lived in a different era, Randy?" "Well… every waking moment I wish I were living before the beginning of existence itself. So I could witness the Big Bang." "It's safer to keep me where I am. Injecting my advanced virility into more primitive eras could have disastrous effects on the timeline." "That way I could know for sure whether our universe is all just one big simulation running on some geek's computer." "I mean, everything being made up of atoms and math is

'Sorry, Professor Kleinzweck -- your 'Chaos Theory' program just crashed.'

'Lately, I've been thinking a lot about evolution. My theory is that it all points to 'survival of the fattest'.'

"The new system is 100% accurate as long as the client is called Colin and lives in Swindon."

'When the music stops, sit down in the nearest chair. Whoever doesn't get a chair is redundant.'

'Maybe it's me, but I have a feeling we're being used as pawns.'

'The bad news is you have a disease that only a highly-paid specialist can pronounce.'

"Is that it? Is that the Grand Unified Theory?"