Swing Set Philosopher Pillows

"Baldo, sometimes work isn't fair. One time my cousin was on a swing and she got off to pick up a piece of purple bubble gum and someone rode of with her bike."

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

Swinging

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

Swing

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

'Where's my horse?'

A bride and a groom on a swing

Automatic swing machine

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

Mood swings: Swing 1 - 'Looks like it's going to be another wonderful day!' Swing 2 - 'Who CARES link brain! I hope it rains acid!!' Swing 3 - 'I think i'm going to CRRRY!'

'How did he make the world in six days?'

Stone henge swing.

"Just how many ways are there to skin a cat?"

"If I had it all to do over again, I would have liked to be the King of Swing."

'Let's give it a whirl. Swing is back!'

"These are wonderful, precious years before he learns that he's benefitting from institutional racism."

'Since you're a teacher, we picked this one from the Tree of Knowledge.'

'You take that back! My mom is too a virgin.'

The Meaning of Life

"Gracie, can you make me soar?"

"I guess when you run out of Tooth Fairy teeth, you gotta go get a job!"

'No, even I don't know the secret of golf.'

Golfers lost on the road

"This is where I come to unwind."

Golf

'Grown-ups sure make playing a lot of work.'

Health & Safety Official Tester.