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Existential Risk

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Bloody hell!"

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

"Housekeeping?!"

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

"The Eggsorcist"

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

'I have a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore.'

'Adam and Eve in the garden of Sweden'

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, in all the solar systems, in all the galaxies, in all the universe, she walks into mine.

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

Star Wars Audience

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

"So is this war movie rated R, rated PG, or rated RPG?"

Tom Hanks

Kirsten Johnson

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

'Oh, nothing, just babysitting the Lord of the Rings.'

Movies vs. Films

Hooray for Bollywood!