Surreal Strategist Pillows

"Staring down the enemy in the heat of battle! That is how sausage is made!"

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

'And as my chart clearly shows, I don't know anything.'

'My door is always open. That's why I installed a tripwire.'

Trojan Hurdler.

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

Under new blame.

Coronavirus Windmills

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

What Business People often say (and what they really mean)

"What are you going to do to make sure you reach this year's financial goals?"

"I say we downsize the company to the five of us and see if we can isolate the problem then."

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

'I thought the memo was quite clear. What part didn't you understand?'

'I still say there are better ways to decide which positions to eliminate!'

"Take me to your thought leader."

'I'll place the bets. You just be sure to hit the hare with the tranquilizer.'

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

"Saturn. No contest. A deadly, treacherous gas giant ringed by a gossamer halo of ice. It symbolizes both death and life. Both evil and good. It symbolizes existence itself."

'It's true. There was a coup.'

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

'Look at him with another business model on his arm.'

'Our company needs a tougher image. So from here on out we'll answer the phone with the greeting, 'what the hell do you want?!'

"Take this mission statement and rewrite it so that it sounds like we care about our customers."

'Now here's my idea...we come up with a really high-priced drug to treat drug side effects...'

'The Board's meeting at nine O'clock - you bring the smoke, I'll bring the mirrors.'

'Remember, son, when the going gets tough, bail out!'

"This may seem counter intuitive, but maybe the solution is to lighten up."

Fermeture des restaurants: la résistance s'organise

"This is where the money will be spent. Oh, sorry. That's a picture of a black hole."

'We buy and sell them.'

'Finally, here's your chance to do something extraordinarily good for our company - quit and start working for the competitor!'

Coronavirus dancing around an EU flag