Surgical Superstar T-Shirts

'I don't care what your mother always told you. The way to this man's heart isn't through his stomach!'

"I'm your doctor, and I'll be here every minute, but while I'm filling out all these forms, Dr.Barlow will do the actual operation."

'I strongly recommend a surgeon who can putt over one who hits the long drive.'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

'Gee!' (doctor looking at x-ray)

"Damn it, nurse! I didn't ask for a twenty. I asked for a ten and two fives."

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"I give up. Where's the patient?'

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

'You'll be awake during the entire procedure...but no peeking!'

'Do we have any oldies but goodies that you would care to hear?'

101 uses of a dead cat: pincushion

Surgery has sign on wall saying 'To Err is Human.'

A football game appears on the operating theatres monitor instead of the patients heartbeat.

Quilt fanatic

'Brain surgery, Harold? Have you lost your mind?!'

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

'Well, I'll be...look at this...there's a song in his heart!'

He said he loved her for her brain but was her appendix he was always taking out.

Anatomy.

'I know we're all terrified of malpractice suits, Bob, but as plastic surgeons, I think we can do a little more than just 'style his hair and call it a day.''hair

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

"The good news is that you inherit Mr. Brumble's entire estate, Miss Finster. The bad news is that he owes an outstanding balance to your plastic surgeon!"

"Look, I'm the bobblehead of this team."

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

Doctor, I can't feel my legs! I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms.

'There's been unexpected complications involving your husband's bill.'

'Sponge diving, Bob?'

'Kid, go out there and play like you're worth 29 million plus signing bonus, buyouts, and endorsement deals. '

"Any chance that was you who just screamed in excruciating pain?"

'Laser Surgery While You Wait.'

'Nurse Wilhelm will be live-blogging the whole procedure.'

'Golf War Syndrome.'