Supporter Of Innovative Teaching Gifts

'How do you know I have a learning disability?- Maybe you have a teaching disability!'

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

'Home Schooling'

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

'This handheld computer is very useful for teaching. It displays my lesson plan, calander, key files, and an extensive menu of put-downs for hecklers and classroom clowns.'

Technologies and distance classes

"I hate negative numbers, and I'll stop at nothing to avoid them."

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"I believe that's a Montessori school."

"She's the best nit nurse this school has ever seen."

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

"Why are all of your answers so mechanical?"

'They say my tests are too hard. Maybe I should switch from Essay to Connect-the-Dot.'

'I will now read the results of my experiments in fruit genetics. . .'

'Oh Darling, I'm so proud! I wish I could give you a big hug!'

Education Plan

'You're being evacuated to a better catchment area.'

'Let's put it this way, your Billy is the only kid in class without his own website,,,'

'A restaurateur prepares macaroni and sells it as pasta. I want you to do the same for the educational program at your school.'

Student to Miss Belcastro, her history teacher: 'We need some newer history.'

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.

'Why can't we just go to school.org?'

'Boasting bumper stickers.'

"We want him to skip joined-up writing and get straight on to 3D printing."

"I wish school was more like TV."

Looking inside the internal maze,

'It's someone from the Society for Ethical Treatment of Principals asking for a donation.'

School administrator of the year "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

'In which on-line university will you enroll?'

'A...B...C...D...E...' - Graffiti on classroom wall.

"I asked the parents to get involved more and now they're home-schooling."

'Ms. Peters, hold all calls. I'm busy implementing yet another hastily conceived and unproven education innovation.'