Supper Clubber Pillows

"I'm sorry, but Chef Scott feels he's moved beyond that concept."

Ladies Drinking In The Dinning Room After The Men Retire To The Drawing Room.

'I'd expected rather more from a pop-up restaurant.'

"Do we have to go Dutch tonight, Arnie? I fancy a Chinese."

Chef's Surprise: "I'm telling everyone that tonight's special is Osso Bucco."

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

"Rump roast?"

Pastry Hat

'and on the Kids' Menu, we have Cranky Pants French Toast...'

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

'Polly wants a cracker! Fetch!'

"My wife thought the phrase 'stick it to the man' meant everyone, hence we're divorced. My new girlfriend and I met at a party. She's krazy, man. We bonded right away and now she's pregnant. It's a squeeze top. My brother's in rehab for sniffing. He never could get his nose out of my business."

'I'm 3 years old - that's 21 dog years - so start pouring!'

Ghostbasters 3

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

The Walk of Shame

"Oh isn't that your squeeze slithering this way?"

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil clowns is that good clowns do nothing."

"Do kids eat free?"

Sober Tooth Tiger

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

'You know things are screwed up when people take late-night comedians seriously and politicians as a joke.'

"Is this fake noodle." "Yes, impasta."

'Do you want toast with that?'

Gangsta wrap.

A clown has a revelation at the shrink 'And then one day it dawned on me Doc... we're just not funny!'

"I'm going to Bognor next year!"

Lengray's 1,001 practical Jokes for beginners (a man getting punched in the face with a mechanical glove).

"It was a really classy restaurant. The waiters drop the food on the floor for you."

"The early bird may get the worm, but the late bird gets delicious table scraps."

Gorgeous Groovers.

"...And to my favorite 'Mr. Down On His Luck' relative, I leave all my spare change."