Supernatural Comedy Buff Pillows

"Just as I expected, Mrs Frimley. You've got vampires."

Backfire

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Physician tending a mummy.

"Bloody hell!"

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

"Is there a vegan option?"

Cat Hecklers

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

'Yes... but is he a good watch dog?'

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

"Beware of the frog"

'Sorry, but I'm arresting you for being in possession of an endangered wild coho salmon.'

Rollercoaster opens when it is still being built.

'When I said you could name your salary, I meant you could give it a name.'

'It would never work out, Blackfire — our alignments are too different.'

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

"I'm sorry, Chuckles. We had to remove your funny bone."

Bird about to dive from diving board into birdbath

'He bought a donkey because he thought he might get a kick out of it.'

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

"Is it 'Measure once, cut twice?' Or 'Cut once, then measure?' Or maybe it's..."

Mime walking dog passes some invisible dog poop.

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

Pyjamas - Party, Sleep and Dawn Raid.

Miami Mice

Trump and the Gender Inclusive Restroom

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

'Okay, I'm going to make the phone ring just once, and I want you to refrain from picking up. Bite the towel if you have to.

'Sexy...I love what you're doing with your ears.'