Supermarket Executive Pillows

Planning Office - Acquired by Tesco

That's not a bad salary is it.

"These new self-service tills will certainly cut our staff bills."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

But is it organic?

Bad for you but to die for

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"We're odd looking but just as good."

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

'Kix? Yes, Ma'am -- you can get your Kix on aisle 66.'

'Tesco's cheif executive meets with staff.'

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

"Oh my god -- I can't believe it's real butter!"

Only One Item or Fewer.

Price may vary with weather.

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

Supermarket Merge

Attack of the 'health' foods

'I've drawn up a health and safety policy for the company.'

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

Low Hanging Fruit

'Retirement Training Program'"Very good, Larry! Just one more step and you'll have the entire aisle blocked!"

Food samples in supermarket - 'There's a stick in mine.'

'...Contains Phixe-knide, TBHQ, hydro-cla, Cyklid, Yetfopnmide - and other unpronounceable stuff.' (grocery store)

'This tuna is being recalled. It contains seahorse.'

Biker chopper shopper

Artificial Isle

'I just couldn't think of the word poultry.'

'Celeb Foods: Damien Hurst's voles in brine.'

"Your chocolate biscuits and cakes are getting smaller - and where's your sweets aisle?"