Super Lawyer Enthusiast Gifts

'He's just been named a super lawyer by the Bar Association.'

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

Wal-Mart Ruling

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

"He'll only talk when his lawyer's present."

Violent Crime Statistics

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

'Lateral hires are always told we do things differently here.'

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

Lady Justice.

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'