Sums Gifts

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

Natural Disasters

"Babe, I'm gonna leave you... It may take a few eons, but I am definitely gonna leave you..."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Scientists are sexy

"Admit it, we're lost."

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

'I say we invade and secure all those renewable resources.'

Welcome to Stratford-On-Avon...Birthplace of William Shakespeare...Park not here, lest ye be towed!

Laughing Zone Ahead

"Beware of the frog"

Rock - see you in a million years!

The Tectonics and Their Plates.

Water is discovered on the moon....

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

Old Geologists Never Die...they just switch to soft rock.

'This rift between you and Dr. Voight has become a chasm.'

Cupcake Excitement Scale

"I've got those 'Don't worry about me, I'll just be here, all alone' blues."

"I learned ridin', I learned cowpokin' and I learned how to eat and sleep under the stars. But, dag nab it, I never learned any geology."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

"Kids these days and their piercings..."

Man Plugged Into His Stereo.

"Over millions of years, carbon turns to diamond. Yet it took dad plus his grill mere minutes to turn last night's marinated chicken into that carbon."

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

Test your patience, back in one hour.

Stratigraphy

'Let's call him lucky!'

'This cave is really damp... and squidgy underfoot'

"No. Bad dog. You may not use fracking to extract a bone you buried."