Summer Chaos Navigator Gifts

Mom? Any chance you could take the kids to your friend's lake cabin? Trying to get them out of your house? Roger. I want to put the vacate" back in vacation.

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

Woman with kids at husbands office.

Stubborn Horse

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

Tired Barbie

"Everyone says she has the clutter of someone twice her age."

Signs of Stress

"Mom, can you come get me?"

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

A dream of consequence

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

Having It All

"Boy, has it been hacked!"

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

'If anyone's still interested, the definition of entropy is ^,'

"Have you heard of Murphy's Law 2.0? It's anything that could possibly go wrong often does...as well as a thing or two that couldn't possibly go wrong."

Careful

'You got him here before the tardy bell, Mrs. Bates, but I'm not sure he's prepared to learn.'

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

Tax Department - Whammy/double whammy

Department to Control Government Growth - 'We need more room.'

"It's funny how that works. It doesn't matter where I am in the house... I can always tell when the novel isn't going well."

"Don't worry. I'll be right back. I just need a little space."

Married Life - Poet unable to write because of noisy children

Going to the pub with kids...

Working from home.

"Frank?"

"We'll have to pick this up later. My plane just went down, sharks ate my personal assistant, and apparently I'm winning some kind of surfing competition."

"Please wait while I load up software you'll never use and stick random icons all over the place."