Style Master Pillows

'It just needs tidying up a bit.'

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

Bad hair day!

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

'She's so put together!'

Beauty is in the eye of the manipulator.

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

"Thank god I bought my layers."

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

A women in a shoeshop.

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

New Suit.

Shoe addict.

Pampered and poodled.

"Absolutely not!"

Keeping warm.

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

At the suit makers

The Young Ladies' Young Gentleman

Mr Metrosexual.

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

'Do you like my little black number?'