Style Perfectionist Pillows

Military Haircuts.

How's that? Fine...(what the hell have you done to me?)

"I’ve seen better metaphors in my litter box."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

'Quick, press control Z!'

Man and woman buying furniture.

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

Poetry repairman

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

Writer

Perfection

"Wallace couldn't come, but I brought some of his fussy prose."

'Don't just stand there, get into focus!'

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

"I refuse to discuss my selfless passion for public service until my hair, makeup and lighting are perfect."

"You're welcome."

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

Sleeping on the Job

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

"But everything seems so neat and orderly we'd never guess that your lives are falling apart."

Social lens of the photojournalist

"Take away his brilliant prose, and he's just some depressed guy."

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

"You didn't iron the crease in my pants!! I'm gonna look ridiculous!!"

Woman trying to straighten a picture of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

Writers Block: "Day 24 and still no typewriter!"

"And on the eighth day, the Lord just puttered around..." "That cloud doesn't belong there. Did I do that? I'd better move it..."

"He hasn't the heart to discharge her. She's been with him for years."

Artist paints UNDO icon onto canvas.

"Don't make me look fat!"