Style Influencer Gifts

Lady showing her new tennis shoes.

"How was L.A.?"

Affectations: Clothes to reinforce your delusions.

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"I got 30 likes but Mom's was not one of them."

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

Other girl's luxuries are my necessities.

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

"What do you want to be when you blow up?"

'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'

"Well, the alternative would be to use your social media accounts to promote toothlessness."

'She dressed herself this morning.'

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

'And the wicked stepmother looked into her smartphone and said, "Selfie, selfie in my face, who's the fairest in this place?"

"Like my new haircut?"

"I'm spending more time promoting myself than I am being myself."

"Perhaps more people would give heed unto the word of the Lord if the Lord had a funny blog."

Witches of Instagram

"This deserves an Instagram photo. Would you mind taking a picture of someone washing the dishes when I'm done?"

"I already have the perfect hashtag!"

'We're an international company, Mr. Zickenbarth. We've got creditors in more than 200 different countries!'

'Your tweets have quite a following.'

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

"This is off our first TikTok."

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

Bill hits the ground running, makes a big splash early on, and rides a roller-coaster of insane popularity right into the "Where Are They Now?" Wilderness of Forgotten Celebrities.