Style-conscious Reader T-Shirts

Blonde woman talking to airport bookshop assistant, 'I'll be spending a lot of time by the pool - do you have anything in pink that would match my bikini?'

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

"Thank god I bought my layers."

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

Hats and Food

New Shoes.

A woman with a novel and poetry handbag.

Arms reach through a mirror to straighten a man's bow tie.

'No way Doug! You can not stick it to the man in new season, smart casual menswear!'

The Return Of The Minipants

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

"Don't say a word! Your eyes, your hair, your T-shirt, your luggage—they say it all."

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

'It's a chinstache. They were popular in the 1800's, but now they're coming back.'

"Did you see that trimmed-up earlier than thou look on her face, just then?"

Bald Man Overcomb

Trendies, INC

'He wears a necktie like he means it.'

"I want it to look good, but not ill-gotten-gains good."

Parrot looking in mirror has feather headdress options.

'That guy is SO tacky.'

It bag and no knickers!

Georgian head-dress

"If they're already killing you, you know they're the right fit."

'Dude, you like, need to get your wallet chain in check!'

"I'm thinking of letting my bangs grow out."

SELECTIONS FROM THE "VICTOR'S SECRET" CATALOGUE

"If they fit, we can return them."

'Oh great,,, More protesters getting on our case about how the magazine industry creates 'unrealistic standards' for the human body,'

'This is me at my most masculine.'

"Would you care to step out of the shop and see how it looks in the fog, Mr. Holmes?"

'Don't worry, if you buy it, you don't have to wear it.'