Studio Humorist T-Shirts

Artist's model for a painting of Hamlet turns up to the studio with a black eye

"Canadian Mt. ‘Rush’more"

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Football Chameleon

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

"The Eggsorcist"

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

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Elevator Music

The Phantom Of The Garden

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

Guitar pickin'

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

"Who is 'coming around the mountain,' John? Could it be your mother?"

'PHWOAR! You should have seen her rear end when she sat on the piano. . . played 'TINK' and 'BOOM' at the same time!'

Pay me not to pay 'Wonderwall'

Rap-scallions

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

Double Saxophone

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

Waiter in resturant sawing violin.

"There will be a Q&A...but in this era of Trump I will be insulting anyone whose questions I don't like."

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

Edward Elgar.

Happy Bifurcation Day,

Dr. Phil takes it home.

All Les's dreams of stardom were coming true, and he'd only played one note.

'A little squirt like Graubart would theorize that the Universe is contracting!'