Studio Humorist T-Shirts

Artist's model for a painting of Hamlet turns up to the studio with a black eye

"Canadian Mt. ‘Rush’more"

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

Fusion Lab. Did you tell the boss we need more hydrogen? Yes, I told him we were out of our element.

Football Chameleon

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

"The Eggsorcist"

Radiator jazz player

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

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Elevator Music

The Phantom Of The Garden

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

Guitar pickin'

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

'PHWOAR! You should have seen her rear end when she sat on the piano. . . played 'TINK' and 'BOOM' at the same time!'

Waiter in resturant sawing violin.

Pay me not to pay 'Wonderwall'

Rap-scallions

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

"Who is 'coming around the mountain,' John? Could it be your mother?"

Double Saxophone

"There will be a Q&A...but in this era of Trump I will be insulting anyone whose questions I don't like."

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

Happy Bifurcation Day,

Edward Elgar.

'Never mind singing it in rap...a simple 'I do' will suffice.''

Dr. Phil takes it home.