Musician Humorist T-Shirts

'One could make the ultimate industrial strength glue by cracking the formula of the goo on night club stages.'

"Canadian Mt. ‘Rush’more"

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Bad Timbre: the world's first Garage Philharmonic Orchestra

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

"The Eggsorcist"

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

Elevator Music

The Phantom Of The Garden

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

Guitar pickin'

Waiter in resturant sawing violin.

Rap-scallions

Double Saxophone

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

'PHWOAR! You should have seen her rear end when she sat on the piano. . . played 'TINK' and 'BOOM' at the same time!'

"Who is 'coming around the mountain,' John? Could it be your mother?"

Pay me not to pay 'Wonderwall'

"There will be a Q&A...but in this era of Trump I will be insulting anyone whose questions I don't like."

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

Edward Elgar.

All Les's dreams of stardom were coming true, and he'd only played one note.

Dr. Phil takes it home.

No Instruments Please

"Ding" "Dong"

'Never mind singing it in rap...a simple 'I do' will suffice.''

"Y'know, sooner or later we're going to have to let her go out unaccompanied."