Structure Sleuth Gifts

"I'm in my third day of trying to figure out which little square I am."

"Ooh, I just love the faux water damage."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

Clickbait

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

"A conundrum, rather than an outright mess, I think, Mrs Ellis..."

The Modern Godot

GM Crops Genie.

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

Newton's Law and Order.

Undercover Biophysicists

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

'It's something to do with a Microsoft copyright infringement.'

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

"...Software upgrade provides a seamless transition from simple functionality to multi-platform confusion, chaos and frustration..."

'Okay - Let's crash that bad boy.'

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

"Password must contain at least one pictograph."

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

"Officer, someone hacked my bluetooth pressure cooker and blew my kitchen apart! What can I do?"