Science Sleuth Gifts

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

'I know Pasteur didn't work under these conditions, but Pasteur didn't have fifty companies trying to steal his trade secrets.'

"We're taking you out of the clinical trial and putting you in a criminal trial."

'Remember, Stevens, things are rarely what they appear to be.'

Great events in Chemistry...

A tanker truck with a warning on the back that reads "The scientific community is divided. Some say this stuff is dangerous, some say it isn't".

'That's it then - Time is money.'

'Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't.'

Basic Research - Practical Applications - Back to Basic Research.

Newton discovers GM fruit.

'Take a look at this everyone - it just could be the signature we've been looking for.'

"The great thing about studying tiny things is that no one knows what the hell you're doing."

'Now what do we do? All our experimental subjects called in healthy!'

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

'Leaves glow away...Apples fall to the ground...Ah, ha. Apples are heavier than leaves.'

"Now, don't overthink it."

'My theory is he's faking sleep in order to get the $50 for the study.'

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

'...but our most useful publication is the 'Journal of Don't-Do-It: It's-Already-Been-Done.''

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

Schrodingers cat at the vets

"In science class, we learned that a solar eclipse is not due to a rolling blackout."

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

'Yes, Sir, I'm still testing the new truth serum. I slept with your wife.'

'Well, now that you've found a cure, all our funding will be sent to another division.'

'It's not supposed to be a triple helix, is it?'

" I think we need to understand the dynamics of what's actually happening here"

"The search for a new painkiller has been a real headache."

Kekule was predestined

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

"You might wanna consider taking a refresher course. Penicillin doesn't come from mold, it comes from the pharmacist."

'The beauty of this is that it is only of theoretical importance, and there is no way it can be of any practical use whatsoever.'

'We've come up with some wonderful antibiotics - but we can't figure out what they're for.'

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

"I thought it was a breakthrough, but it was only a misplace decimal."