Stripy Lawn Lover Gifts

Lawn mower, mowing round sunbather.

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Beginning Yarder.

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

Beware of the Lawn

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

'Al's Lawn Care Service: There's no crabgrass too crabby for us!'

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

I love tennis

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

"I've found the lawnmower!"

'...so I said to Linda, 'I can't do yard work in the rain!''

"It doesn't mean you, Hickford!"

"I can't go on. All the weeding, mowing, digging, pesticides, and gopher holes really hurts you know. It's just not worth it anymore."

"Who's a good boy?!!"

'You know it's too hot to use the sprinkler when the spray turns to steam.'

Crazy paving company.

'Be sure to bring home your divots so you can patch the bare spots in our lawn.'

Mower Repair

"I can't believe I went so long without A.C."

'Honey, could you turn the water on?'