Lawn Lovers Gifts

'Honey, could you turn the water on?'

'You might think it's your roof, but it's really my yard.'

Lawn Furniture/Yawn Furniture.

"Wait for it …"

No caption. (Frank is holding hose. A loop-de-loop behind his is matched by a loop-de-loop in the water coming out of the hose.)

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

August: An all out effort will be needed to keep control now. You should not have booked your holiday this month.

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Beginning Yarder.

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'Don't forget to put gas in the car and the mower.'

Beware of the Lawn

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

'Al's Lawn Care Service: There's no crabgrass too crabby for us!'

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

A psychic mows the lawn.

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

Cow Pilot.

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

'...so I said to Linda, 'I can't do yard work in the rain!''

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

"I've found the lawnmower!"

"It doesn't mean you, Hickford!"