Strip Club Owner T-Shirts

'Her dad owns the local barbershop.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'Every piece of equipment is hooked up to battery cells in the basement, and we actually sell electricity back to the power company!'

"This feels like an accomplishment."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

Beer Stall

Shaken not stirred

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"Have you seen my dad?"

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

The Reaper's Arms

It's our new twin-handle beer mug. It's for manly, two-fisted drinkers, as well as weaklings like you who can't lift it with one hand.

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

Frank and Ernie's Country Diner. Special Alphabet Soup. Come in and sit for a spell.

Dance.

Infinity Tavern

Trilby - 'Bonjour, Suzon!'

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

Bar: Now serving 24 hours - 'I want to get as wasted as you look.'

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

Dinner at the Jolly Sandboys (opening to Ch 19)

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'