Strauss Enthusiast Pillows

Clock

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

Pope Benedict 16th.

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

A Scottish Terrier playing bagpipes wins the dog show.

William Wallace over-applies the talcum powder before battle.

'...the next train arriving at platform one is the 10.45 fast service to orgasm central!'

'It wasn't like this when I left it!'

William Wallace.

'What exactly is 'Haggis'?'

'You seem to be suffering from frontier mentality...'

Marcel Proust.

'This spider's persistence is remarkable - that's web 9.0.'

Alex Salmond: Bannockburn.

'Go through laddie. Only a true Scotsman disnae wear anything under his Kilt.'

In The Spring, A Young Man's Thoughts Turn Fancy

"What makes you think I have buck fever?"

"Boy, that Isaac Newton is one smart cookie!"

Franz Liszt

'Dr Seuss is awarded a PHD.'

Marcel Proust

Happy Burn's Night!

"I felt the Earth Move!"

''Stiff shaft', 'long and straight', 'up and in'...I thought you were talking about sex!'

Man in kilt with a balloon.

Scottish Independence Vote.

Och aye the noo!

Let's play hide-the-sausage!

The Scottish lion tamer.

'My problem is that I'm a nice guy.'