Strategy Advisor T-Shirts

"Next?? How should I know what comes next?"

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

A fight in the Boardroom.

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

After a day long meeting, the decision, as usual, is made in the hallway.

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

"Quit stalling, Smithers. Where's the SALES chart?"

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

'Our problem is how to lower quality while raising prices...'

Our Two Parties, Explained

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

Target your customer.

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

"Now I'll demonstrate how, with a minimum of capital investment, you can make a mountain out of a molehill!"

'What are we, wimps? Are we gonna let a bunch of rabbits push us all over the field? Come on, big guys.'

'What kind of a mission statement is that?'

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

Maybe it's now time to review our customer care strategy!"

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

Business Target

Game changing

"It's not bulls**t if we call it strategy."

'Our strategy is perfect! This is the customers' fault - they don't think the way WE do!'

'Don't look now, but I think we're being followed.'

'We're well positioned, but we lack leadership.'

"It's our new corporate strategy. I'd get on board if I were you, Watkins."

"When it comes to online marketing, I'm puzzled."

"I know it's a big risk, Fred, but don't lose sight of its strongest selling point: You're taking it, not me!"