Strategic Pranksters Pillows

'That's not bad. But most of the other consulatnats gave us mission statemens with more detail.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

'It's called 'cause and effect.' I pound this log and Tarzan goes bananas.'

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

"This should send the midwife off in a frenzy."

'I've only come to get my nail back.'

'Excuse me, I'm going to talk on the cellphone while pretending you're not here.'

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

ABC Diapers. Comfy Tushy Diapers. Now 3 times more absorbent! Note to self: Drink 4 times more juice.

Tonite: Gala Costume Party. Got your costume for the big party? No, I'll just part my hair on the other side and go as my own reflection.

We've already got one. A hidden microphone in the staff coffee area.

A convenient attack of swine flu...

'Checkmate!'

The Ascent of Man.

Someone's going to have to tell him he's adopted...

Tartar sauce.

'Oh, the usual, a postman, a couple of salesmen, a pizza delivery boy, how was your day?'

"Not that it's right, but I understand. I was young once and used to sneak out to do crop circle, too."

'Looks like someone got their bags mixed up at daycare drop-off.'

Thank you for not making faces during teleconferences with the boss.

Monkey dropping apples on Newton's head.

Back to the Holidays

You know what I like about our meetings? There's always more finger pulling than pointing.

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

"I think we both know who did it...."

"You're making a complete ass of yourself, Rodney!"

"'Let's introduce him to a mirror' he said. 'It'll be fun he said'. You call the coroner!"

A clown is walking a balloon dog. He is pretending it is weeing on a fire hydrant.

'Your loyalty to the company is exemplary, Potter, but we'll have to let you go if you can't stop chewing up the conference room furniture!'

Revenge Of The Tipped Cows