Strategic Lover Gifts

Strip Chess

'I sent out for everything.'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"I love fast break business success."

Colin could see that his competitor had obviously done his market research.

Planned Parenthood: Not Tonight Dear. I Have a Headache.

Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? My wife doesn't have a job. The other night she told me it'd be nice if I helped out a little more at home. So I replied "hey, I don't ask you to come to my place of business and do my job for me." I see. Have you tried the "act like I never said it and wait for her to forget it" routine? Yes, sir. I also, tried the "don't-make-eye-contact-until-she-forgets-it" maneuver. I'm running out of ideas.

'I believe in aggressive mergers, Celia.'

'I gotta bad feeling about this.'

A war would have been bad enough, but losing Alsace-Lorraine in a poker game?

Dating the efficiency expert.

"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."

Siege of Vicksburg - Sappers Approach Confederate Fortifications

'It was so romantic. He got down on one knee, showed me the ring, and proposed--right after we exchanged credit reports.'

The Appearance of the Gatling Machine-Gun in 1864 caught the world by surprise.

Marriage counselor, living together counselor or a just screwing around counselor.

'First, you have to stop treating your husband like a child.'

If you are ringing your coach to ask about your next move then we're finished.

Kosovo.

Count Von Moltke.

"No, I don't think our marriage would benefit from a mission statement."

"Here is the campaign strategy and here are the after-the-fact excuses."

'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'

Don't let your your evil twin be your wingman when trying to pick up a woman in a bar.

'Pay no attention, they are a couple of ex husbands.'

"How's your bowling game, soldier?"

'When you play hard to get you really mean it, don't you?'

"If you can't beat them, sir, perhaps you should consider colluding with them."

"I married for contrast."

"Russia's always bigger than you think."

'...assuming the numbers are right, ask her to marry you.'

'This is us.'