Storyteller Supreme T-Shirts

"Guilty on all counts, Your Honor. However, with more attention to character development, pacing and tone, we're confident the defense will find a much wider audience and a winning verdict in the appeal phase!"

'I see they're having editorial differences upstairs again.'

"Can't you just look at the pictures,daddy? Some of us have to get up for school in the morning!"

'You honor, I'd like to tell my client's life story with the accompaniment of a string quartet.'

"Stop billing your daughter for reading her bedtime stories!!"

Took a tiny nothing molehill and created this huge, amazing mountain

"Mr. Bream, it's time for you to put on a humiliating smock and let the doctor tell you about his fishing trip to Canada."

"Enough about your Xbox already!"

Nope, he's not a sidekick, but in some ways he's more important than one. PR.

'Hey! Can she tell a story or what?'

Anyway I thought I'd have a go at this writing lark on the first publisher I showed my scribbles gave me a five book deal.

"Good memoir, but we're looking for something more candid. Like not-being-invited-home-ever-again-for-Thanksgiving candid."

"He's so crooked even his autobiography is based on a true story."

Shepherd and eurydice

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

Edgar Allen Poe

Facts of life - The birds and the dogs.

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'