Storyteller Of Justice Gifts

"Objection denied."

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

"It's up to you to keep the dream alive..."

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

Tell me a deposition, mommy.

Lawyer's secretary has in boxes labeled: Before the Fact and After the Fact.

"I must protest, M'Lud. Prosecurity counsel is blantantly attempting to wheedle the truth from the accused."

Mou...Man trap!

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Someday we'll look back on this and think, ‘Why the hell didn't we sue?' '

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

'... And I appreciate that you've 'saved the world from certain doom on numerous occasions', but you still have to pay your taxes.'

"Can you recommend something for the attorney who got me everything?"

A Lawyer's Closing Arguments Wins the Support of the Jury

"You are hereby sentenced to one year of swimming with the people."

'Must you be so judgemental?'

'Speak of the devil, there's my attorney now.'

'It drives me crazy when people whine about the collapse of the system!'

"I sentence you 500 hours of community service - You can start by mopping this floor."

Law 'N' Order

A throng runs out the courthouse to follow a car that is driving away decorated with a sign that reads "Just Acquitted".

'An injunction against the First Amendment? - Can we DO that?'

"You're lucky you're a U.S. citizen and this is America! The government has generously offered you five free guesses about what you're charged with and where you're going to be secretly detained."

"And today if the prosecutor says 'Liar, liar, pants on fire,' do not turn around to check."

"It's not really perjury if you're a compulsive liar."

'How do you like THAT disparate impact?'

"Well, perhaps 'guilty' is too strong a word."

'So I'll see you in court tomorrow afternoon...and bring your toothbrush.'

"When he left, he took all his things, including his name on the door."

'You're my 100,000th conviction... so, I'm going to take 25 off your sentence.'

'Your Honor, we find the defendant to be the subject of misplaced guilt.'