Story Weaver T-Shirts

'Radiology confirms that, like many other teachers of English, you do have a book in you.'

"Look, making you happy is out of the question, but I can give you a compelling narrative for your misery."

"I translate books from English into better English."

"'Yes,' she mumbled?... Sighed?... Muttered?... Snarled?... Hissed?... Growled?..."

"Let's say you want to write an award-winning short story—you just push this key, here..."

500 pages and one masterpiece later, Stephan makes a horrifying discovery.

Book publisher telling author about some changes needed.

Book publishing.

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

"Right here is where you lost the narrative flow."

'He couldn't talk, so I taught him to write. Right now he's working on another best seller.'

Pipe Dream.

"Your editor wants to know if you have enough flexibility to just give up."

Recycling Station: Manuscripts.

'Is this your first book launch?'

Writer Will Work For One Good Plot Idea

Sketches by Boz - Seven Dials

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Manuscripts.

"No, really, we publishing titans do value the opinion of a newsletter editor."

'I bet that new guy can't wait to tell a bunch of tall tales about where he's been and stuff...'

'Another day...another blank page taunted him. 'How long can this block go on?' He wondered. 'I don't know,' said the paper.'

"The problem is there's no engine. Just a mysterious plot device."

CIA, 'I'm suspended for three months? Great! -- it'll give me time to work on my book!'

'I'm filing for the Great American Divorce.'

Walter Scott

'This is a real tear jerker but there is just not much of a market for hard luck stories.'

John Galsworthy

"Maybe you should buy a computer so it looks like you're working"

"How did computer hackers manage to destroy your handwritten book report?"

'True, I'm nearing the end, but at least, there's rarely a dull moment.'

"Please, sir, do you have any spare plot ideas?"

Writer

"C'mon! Give me some inspiration for my novel."

A writer walks over water towards a publisher