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"... And they all lived appley-ever-after."

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Swan Fairy Tales

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

Little Princess.

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Hansel and Gretel Day School.

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

"Mommy usually reads me a story, then slips me a twenty."

'Come on, girl! I know you can do it! Jump over the moon!'

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

'It doesn't say what she had for dessert on Thanksgiving. It just says she made a coach out of her pumpkin.'

"Why did I start the story with 'Twice upon a time?' Because it's a sequel."

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

'The cow jumped over the Moon? -- What was SHE on?'

"Is the Itsy Bitsy Spider obsessive-compulsive?"

Bedtime in Ancient Greece

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."