Story-time Lovers Pillows

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

'He took from the rich and gave to the poor? It sounds like wealth redistribution.'

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

Little Princess.

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

"Only one pailful? Did they have water restrictions like we do?"

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

Hansel and Gretel Day School.

"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"

"Mommy usually reads me a story, then slips me a twenty."

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

'Come on, girl! I know you can do it! Jump over the moon!'

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

Bedtime in Ancient Greece

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

'It doesn't say what she had for dessert on Thanksgiving. It just says she made a coach out of her pumpkin.'

'What did St. Patrick have against snakes?'

"Why did I start the story with 'Twice upon a time?' Because it's a sequel."