Story Catcher T-Shirts

'It's for Sunday School, Mom -- I Googled 'Adam and Eve.''

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

'How fast can you hype?'

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

The Fourth Little Pig

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

The Poky Little Pupa.

You do know it's Harry Potter who's real and JK Rowling is just one of his spells?

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

The writer: something who devotes a lifetime of solitude to the same of communication.

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

Iris Murdoch

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

I figured out how we can pay for the kids' college tuitions. Do tell. I'm going to leave for a year of self-discovery, which I will chronicle in a best-selling memoir. Oh, but

' 'Cat in the Window'...chapter 14...'

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

When Shakespeare gets up early, on the wrong side of the bed of a stranger, and in a clown suit... Later that same day, he will commence work on 'The Comedy of Errors.'"

'I'm not being punished! I'm reading because I happen to enjoy reading!'

Blue Stockings

The Dragon with the Girl Tattoo.

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

What would Charlotte Bronte do, she thought to herself.

Always a bigger fish.