Stoner Humor Lover Gifts

Please keep off the grass.

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

Crap from the future.

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

'Let's go to a bar and do something funny.'

"Despite thoroughly scraping the celebrity barrel, that Orwellian nightmare Celebrity Big Brother is back on our screens again."

Honest Voting Stickers

The Monroe Doctrine

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

"Ah...summer...and umbrellas as far as you can see...it reminds me of England!"

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

"Here's a request from someone who'd like to hear something in tune for a change. Oh, we have a comedian out there, I see."

"Pass that."

Before disposing of useless information please make file copies.

Evil Henchman Gets a Promotion.

Think tanks.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I simply can't believe that I've won this award. I keep wanting to pinch myself."

'I'm looking for an assistant who can keep me in mind of how well I'm doing.'

Chris O'Dowd

Our large economy size packet hasn't been selling...it's too big to carry home.

'Never forget, Sweetheart, it's my low comedy that keeps you in high fashion!'

Only in America

Suggestions and Cheap Shots.

'...and do you solemnly swear to update your facebook status to 'married'?'

"It's not so much a minivan as it is a hearse for our youth."

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

Police Lineup Escape

Dollars Press Conference

"I'm resigning so I can spend more time with my wonderful family, here."

"I don't know what that is, either - it could be the Olsen twins."

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff,'

Spying Smart TV

"Welcome to Alabama. Pro-life at birth; not so much after that."

Euro Collapse