Stocking Enthusiast Gifts

"You guys have it made."

The day the stock market went UP.

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

"We've called this special Stocholders meeting because we want all of our stock back."

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

"You will be visited by three ghosts - the Ghost of Porfolios Past, The Ghost of Present Positions and the Ghost of Commodities Future."

'Look on the bright side; you got out of that stock before it became...unstable.'

'Just to let you know the cause of your pain and my advice is Quite Watching Stock Prices Go Up And Down.'

Bug hanging up stockings

Cheer up, you'll get your day.

"Most of what I want this year is listed on the Nasdaq."

A centipede's Christmas stockings

Circa 1490: The area we now know as Wall Street.

'Stocks were high...then low...then suddenly high again on news of a new drug to treat mood swings...'

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

'I today's market news, Greed roared back.'

"We're on our way to the mall to do some off-line shopping."

Got Rationality?

"How many times have I told you? No trading Asian market at the dinner table."

"Who's on duty today...you or me?"

'In today's action, the Dow Jones Industrial Average cratered, then soared, then swooned, then skyrocketed, then plummeted, then rebounded, and finally threw up.'

'I don't know about this new computer inventory system. It just ordered a thousand left handed four fingered surgical gloves.'

'I actually look forward to hibernating during bull markets.'

"I was doing pretty well in the stock market until I discovered there were laws."

Wall Street Lights.

Stock market worries.

Bull and Bear Nightmare

'...but the good new is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

Christmas Cow.

"Oh I don't know - if you've seen one wall street crash, yhou've seen them all."

"My favorite time of year is earnings season."

Fortune - Lost a Fortune.