Stick-wielder Gifts

I love hockey!

"River well stocked this year."

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

Boy and his dog

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

"The universe must love dogs - otherwise, why would sticks just fall from the sky?"

"It's such a nice day. Why don't you go outside and plagiarize something?"

Man throwing stick for dog

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

"Wait a minute. Where am I going? I'm a writer."

Forrest Gander

Cow cartooning block.

Shepherd

'I'm sorry Rex, but since getting this new stick for Christmas, I have no further need for you.'

House Plant Party

"I'm beginning to believe that this is just busy work."

The sword is mightier than the pen.

"The applications are limitless."

'Meet the Author'/'Meet the Plagiarist' - An Author and a Plagiarist selling and signing the same book story and title.

'Made your point.'

''Fetch'? - What are you, my personal trainer?'

"Well I thought it was obvious I would be charging a finders fee"

'Good boy. That's better than the others, but still too long. For playing fetch, I prefer a shorter stick, shaped like that, without bark or moss, and not quite as heavy.'

The Carrot and Stick.

'If you can smile when everything around you is going wrong... you're probably in the repair business!'

'He was a darn fine mechanic.'

'If you were a carp where would you go?'

'He's always trying to get rid of that stick. I bring it back just to torture him.'

'Let's switch sides. My feet are killing me.'

'My, my, don't we look fetching.'

"It's worse than I thought."

Bubba gets Carpal Funnel Syndrome.

'You're supposed to fetch the stick back,not throw it.'

Writer Crisis