Step-mum Gifts

Step Mom's Diner: Under New Management.

Lady asking her fiance's son if she can be his new mother.

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

"I'm bilingual. I can talk to parents and step parents."

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

"We penguin fathers are the greatest!!!..."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies.'

Couple with lots of kids. Woman says: 'This is our daughter, my son from my first marriage, John's daughter from his second marriage, and I've no idea who the one on the end is.'

'The only game my Dad knows is playing possum.'

Going into the relationship, Tom knew Loretta was a package deal.

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."

Mom's Diner - Thanks for not talking about your father.

Base camp for Ed and Janet Wilson's courageous attempt to scale Mt. Blended Family.

Child on a schedule.

"Our training on managing a work life balance is running late so you'll need to get someone to pick your kids up."

"That's my mum and her boyfriend's the one next to my dad who's behind his girlfriend next to his second wife, just behind my mums first husband."

"We've found your birth mother."

'Don't take it too hard, Dad, Mr. Hodes down the street is just having a great year.'

"Mom?!"

'You can't tell me what to do! You're not my 'ruler'! Heck, you're not even my real dad!'

A kid like me needs a dad like you! You know. Someone to post bail.

"It's your mother calling."

Quick Response Forces at East 89th Street

'Mom's Diner: your meal free if you wash all the dishes and take out the garbage.'

Mr. Dombey introduces his daughter Florence

"When you say you want to speak to my parents, do you mean my mommy and her new husband, or my daddy and his new wife or my mommy and daddy?"

"Sorry to break it to you like this, son, but you're not adopted."

'Mom & her new husband' and 'Pop & his live-in girlfriend'.

'Will you marry us?'

"I'll clean my room when I want. I don't have to listen to you. You're just my step ladder."

"Now that we've got a new bull, is he the calve's stepfather?"

'Guess what, Mom - Suzie and I just found out that we have the same ex-Dad!'

'Make Mother's Day shopping a piece of cake.'

'Wow...nice job of bluffing with reverse psychology, Victoria!. . . Um. . . You were bluffing right?'

"I'm dealing with tweens at home and fiends at work."