Step-motherhood Gifts

'He wanted a girl just like the girl who married his dad, instead, he got me!'

Lady asking her fiance's son if she can be his new mother.

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

"I'm bilingual. I can talk to parents and step parents."

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies.'

Couple with lots of kids. Woman says: 'This is our daughter, my son from my first marriage, John's daughter from his second marriage, and I've no idea who the one on the end is.'

Mom's Diner - Thanks for not talking about your father.

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."

Going into the relationship, Tom knew Loretta was a package deal.

Base camp for Ed and Janet Wilson's courageous attempt to scale Mt. Blended Family.

Child on a schedule.

"Our training on managing a work life balance is running late so you'll need to get someone to pick your kids up."

'Until I met your Mom, yes.'

"That's my mum and her boyfriend's the one next to my dad who's behind his girlfriend next to his second wife, just behind my mums first husband."

"It's your mother calling."

Mr. Dombey introduces his daughter Florence

Step Mom's Diner: Under New Management.

"We've found your birth mother."

'Mom's Diner: your meal free if you wash all the dishes and take out the garbage.'

"Mom?!"

Quick Response Forces at East 89th Street

"When you say you want to speak to my parents, do you mean my mommy and her new husband, or my daddy and his new wife or my mommy and daddy?"

"Sorry to break it to you like this, son, but you're not adopted."

'Mom & her new husband' and 'Pop & his live-in girlfriend'.

'Will you marry us?'

'Wow...nice job of bluffing with reverse psychology, Victoria!. . . Um. . . You were bluffing right?'

'Make Mother's Day shopping a piece of cake.'

"I'll clean my room when I want. I don't have to listen to you. You're just my step ladder."

'Guess what, Mom - Suzie and I just found out that we have the same ex-Dad!'

"I'm dealing with tweens at home and fiends at work."

"Now that we've got a new bull, is he the calve's stepfather?"

'It must have belonged to Mom before she married Dad. He calls it his step-ladder.'

'Shall we have a small family Alfred? - I've got 10 kids from my first marriage!'

"Okay! In the thirty five to forty age group, who's the fairest of them all?"