Stealth Technology Fans Pillows

'Stealth broom.'

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Time Machine Collision

'It has all the comfort of a regular jet, but it's invisible to shareholders.'

"Barbara, will you check your texts for a ring emoji?"

'A-1 security from crime ... but can't stand the isolation.'

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

"It appears you have a virus."

'Don't you ever get tired of all the whispering?'

"All I need now is a trainer!"

'This stealth technology just keeps getting better!'

'My laptop's being repaired and I felt lost without a screensaver to stare at.'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: All in a Day's Work

TV moments we never see, 'Branded'

Smile you're on camera! You're also on my podcast!

Sugar Machine

'We had no idea you were coming' - ACME Stealth Missile

'It says we should start flying south by southwest in a 'V' formation at 7:57 Wednesday morning.'

"We don't need facial recognition for our long-term employees. We just match their butts to the seat of their chair."

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

'Maybe we should get into high-tech.'

Putin and some Russian hackers

"Sh-h-h. I think I hear something."

Selfie Extension Stik

"I'm going to demonstrate how dogs are stealth ninjas in the dark. See how I move silently....."

We know your e-mail address!

"Harry! You?"

'I warned you that it wasn't user friendly!'

'Bo-Peep was fed-up with losing us all the time, so she has us all wear these radio-locator collars now.'

'I've found a cafe just 300 yards from where you're standing. We could meet their for a latte.'

The man who discovered human error...

"I remember when 'family time' meant everyone staring at the same screen."

"There's an app for that?"