Static Cling Survivor T-Shirts

'Bob, you're suffering from embarrassing static cling.'

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

Office worker pushing a pile of papers on trolley.

A guide to seasons in the North East

Learn to play the violin in one weekend - 'This isn't working! It's Saturday evening already and I've only got as far as holding it properly...'

Emergency Pants

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

Castaway harnessing electricity.

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

'He needs professional HELP!'

"No you are not ok! Tell me what's wrong! You've been sitting for two minutes without checking your phone!"

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

'I like the way you handle responsibility, Mac, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

'Look at the bright side. Think of our mutual funds going up, up, up!'

Desert island has bottle bank and paper bank. Castaway sees message in bottle float towards island.

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, so we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

'What luck!'

'Quick, shut the door! The flu!'

... and I'd suggest you take more frequent breaks from your computer.

"Is this the queue for Funworld?"

"Mr. Crusoe, you have some heft overdue fines."

A diet high in cholesterol can be dangerous to your health.

Stranded Techie Needs Batteries

'I sure hope you're a marriage counselor.'

Welcome centre

'What luck. It's Kosher.'

'Don't use that arm... for a day or two!'

Notice on desert island - sand for sale

Rat Race

"It's from, The Environmental Protection Agency. They're fining us for polluting the ocean with messages in plastic bottles!"

"Well, my pension was tied up in the cruise liner industry."

"It's too bad you're allergic to nuts."