Starting Culinary School Pillows

A chef teaches a classroom of other chefs how to properly flip something using a spatula.

'Cooking'

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"You're the lid to my pot."

6 Brothers Falafel

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

Cookbooks

Picking pastries.

"Rump roast?"

"I'm so proud - she's already learning her shapes."

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"How fresh is the calamari?"

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

"These things are delicious. Hard and crunchy on the outside, soft and chewy on the inside!"

Turkey Autopsy

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

Chef uses Harp to cut Sausages