Star Sign Followers Pillows

'And our star signs are perfectly compatible!'

Capricorn/goat

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'It wouldn't work - you're Leo and I'm Sagittarius.'

'If you had been born two days later you'd have been kind and clever with a great sense of humour.'

"Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, when Jupiter is in his 6th house or Saturn is in his 2nd, until death do you part?"

Ill next Thursday

"We're not compatible. I'm a Virgo and your an idiot..."

'It wouldn't work - you're Leo and I'm Sagittarius.'

Mama Z'Belle...astrologer...your fortune based on the science of astronomy: 'Oh, oh it looks like your chart has shifted red...'

'Don't you think it's strange that all snakes are Aries, Taurus or Gemini...?'

Lost santa and reindeer.

". . . and in the corner to my right, weighing 217 pounds, fighting as a Capricorn with Capricorn rising and Mars conjunct Uranus in the fifth, out of Beaufort, South Carolinaaa. . ."

Man convinced by a flattering character sketch

'Ha ha! You've been afraid of someone else's future!'

'I'm a Pisces.'

'Why, yes, I am a Capricorn...how did you know?'

Horoscope: Sagittarius. You could visualize the results of some of your plans when the perfect partner comes to your aid.

'I don't deny that my client murdered a man, but his moon was in Taurus, folks, His moooooon was in Taurus!'

Text Santa

Joan was a true believer in Astrology. However, this was the first time she had come face to face with a real member of the Zodiac... a giant scorpio!

'...and according to our star signs we're perfectly matched!'

"Her Taurus was in opposition to my Libra."

'True, the Ezra Yomp Scholarship is very generous, but you have to be a capricorn to apply.'

"Wow! I bet you're a Pisces or Aquarius!"

'I think the new convertible is because they're going through a mid-life Pisces.'

'Capricorns have all the luck.'

Gemini/people

"So, you're certain that it will be okay for me to travel during December ... "

Pisces

"And if I move Mercury over here, all the Libras go nuts."

Mercury rising.

Rudolph's Mask

'Here's your problem. The software was manufactured in November and your computer was manufactured in February. Sagittarius is incompatible with Aquarius.'

'I'll need to run a few tests and find out what your horoscope says.'