Stage Presence Pillows

Guitar.

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Robert Fripp

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

'They all want to play the star.'

Pirate

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Taking a peek at the audience

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

Modern Major General

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

Mikado

Jack Gleeson

Scarpia from Tosca

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

Freddie Mercury

Karataoke

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Come on! They're posting the spring musical. I can't wait! I want a romantic part! With and elegant gown. Good luck with that! We're doing "Cats."

Ladies

Woman crying with happiness.

Eric Clapton.

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

Stephen Fry

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

Tina Turner

'This marriage is turning into a complete farce.'

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

Magic Tricks

"Squirting flower, squirting flower...."

Ralph Rackstraw HMS Pinafore