Stag Party Gifts

Ten pin bowling.

Men. Women. Party Poopers.

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

'I had ten pints last night. That's the last time I drink rum during the week.'

'Don't you think you've had enough?'

"Next time you drink to forget, could you at least remember to pay your bar bill!"

"His note says the bachelor party was so great, he's decided to remain a bachelor."

Dutch Courage

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

'No standing while room is in motion.'

'He made an excellent jelly.'

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 9.

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

Balancing two espresso martinis

"I am so attracted to you right now."

Face painting by numbers.

Beers

Shaken not stirred

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

Children's Party

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

'Sorry, miss. It seems to be stuck!'

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"Whine and cheezed party."

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

"Kid gloves, Hernandez. You gotta use kid gloves!"

"Honey, I think that's too many bows."

"It turns out I just wasted the whole morning networking with a dog."