Squeaky Stealth Survivors T-Shirts

"…Ok, tough guy, see this scar? Prius hit me—didn’t even hear it coming." "I got that beat. Right here: three-year-old woke me from a nap with a fork."

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

'It has all the comfort of a regular jet, but it's invisible to shareholders.'

Dave invents the remote belt

Self-Assembly Bookcase

'Never underestimate my ability to slink'

Camouflage company's annual staff photograph.

For workers who are in need of a discreet spot to catch some Z's comes Napquest.

Undercover Agent

"I am a ninja rabbit. I am stealth personified. I am one of the unseen. I am now invisible...Darn."

'We had no idea you were coming' - ACME Stealth Missile

'I like the soothing squeaking of the dessert cart wheels better than any background music.'

"There's that squeak again."

"I'm going somewhere without cell service because I'm incapable of turning my phone off myself."

"They're no longer on squeaking terms."

Sock hell

"Oh, no. Here comes that couple we just met whose names I forget because I wasn’t listening to them!"

"This Thanksgiving, we're going to serve whatever we can get from the food bank."

'It's quiet out here...almost too quiet!'

Why Creatures Of The Night Don't Wear Corduroy

'I want some shoes that squeak.'

Waiting and waiting and waiting room

Spray on Camouflage

Ninja convention

'He won't be easy to catch. He's well rested - slept through the sermon.'

Checking the closet.

Two ninjas taking a 'stealthy'.

"They can't see us if we don't move."

A Furtive Move

'...When the ref's not looking, pop him with this pin.'

"Well, at least we're marooned in a muzak-free environment."

Flood victims.

Suddenly Kip hit an area not marked on his Creaky Board Floor Map. The curfew police would not be sympathetic.

"I'd kill for a spider-hole like that in Manhattan."