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The Anti-Agent

James Bond in a Snow Globe

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

'I can't read their smoke signal. It's encrypted.'

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."

"His name's Bond. Mittens Bond."

'Somebody close the window. Those pesky drones are getting in.'

"I want to spill the beans, but I'm waiting till I have access to classified or sensitive beans."

"Why don't we call you 'Deeper Throat'?"

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

Pet Drone

"They rubbed my tummy, chief- I told them everything."

'We want to make a movie about making a fake movie so you can sneak us out of Washington.'

A spy peering round the corner.

'The close Ops surveillance people have just sent these photo's over and we now strongly suspect that Jimmy the Greek is onto us...'

"China Ministry of State Security Royal Infiltration Training Unit"

'How's the meeting going, Ed?'

Your life is in great danger...

"So, how long have you been a double agent, Tommy?"

Ian Fleming

Two men converse secretively

'He's practicing for his appearance before the congressional committee on torture.'

Secret agent 36-24-36 was lucky she was wearing her new bullet-proof swimsuit when she confronted the intruder.

'This assignment calls for a chicken.'

CIA, NOW HIRING, 'My resume? - I memorized it and burned it.'

Press spy infiltrates Buckingham palace dressed as a guard.

"Sales rep from Milton Keynes? You prove he no British spymaster who sent you on secret mission to Bananastan?"

'Hey, come back with my laptop!' 'Ha, some spy he is!'

'What makes you think our office is bugged?'

'Okay, here's how your contributor's brand new machine works! Now give me my money!'